What 80s movies tought me about life, family and parenthood

Ok so when I was 9 years old, maybe 10, I remember inviting a neighborhood friend over to my house after hanging out at the local pool to watch one of my favorite movies and her mom telling me no and looking appalled. So I went home and told my mom, how strange I thought it was that my friend's mom had such a strange reaction, after all I wanted to watch was Dirty Dancing.

Before you go all judgment on my mom for allowing me to watch it, let me make my case and also point out that my other favorite movie was pretty woman.  Ok, so looking back on some of my favorite movies growing up I realize not all of them were exactly age appropriate but man did I take some great life lessons from them, especially as a girl who turned into a woman.

1. I begin with Dirty Dancing, at the time I thought it was a story about a girl who loved to dance with a cute guy who also loved to dance and her parents didn't like him. The whole abortion thing went right over my head, probably until I was in high school, maybe in college. When you are that young and you don't understand something in a grown up movie, you just ignore it as boring part of the movie, and well, I pretty much disregarded that story line until late high school when it dawned on me what a total ass Robie really was.

But here are the lessons I learned. First, learn to dance and find a guy that likes to dance, well because dancing is awesome. Carrying two watermelons is hard, always ask a friend for help. Also, guys will tell you almost anything to get in your pants and if you let them you might get pregnant, and here is where this movie is genius, it shows young women the reality of this situation. Most guys, will not stick around to help you, you will feel scared and desperate, and his life will go on and he will move on to another girl. Secret abortions are terrible things, full of dangerous circumstances for women. Regardless, of where you side on this issue, its a great opportunity to talk to someone about it. Also, your friends might not be able to help you raise the baby no matter how decent they are.  It also thought me, that my parents don't always do right, but always mean well. What, parents aren't perfect?? Incredible. And lastly, sometimes, you have to follow your own path and go against your parents, because no one, and I mean no one, puts baby in a corner.

2. Pretty Woman. Now, sure this is  another questionable storyline, about a prostitute but to me as a kid it was about a poor girl who dressed a little bit trashy who then wore beautiful clothes after falling for a rich guy. My mother never let me watch the BJ scene growing up, but later in life I still fast forward thru it, as said above, no importance given to it.

Here are the lessons that I learned. If you don't get an education, you will end up poor and wearing plastic boots and barely there clothes and no one will sell you a dress in rodeo drive. But if you are successful you can buy clothes anywhere, stay in fancy hotels and go to operas. Seriously, think about this story, it shows you two girls with little education in difficult but real situations. One gets lucky and gets a glimpse into what life could be like if she had finished school. For a brief moment the movie lets you buy into the Disney bullshit, that a man will save you from your life and make your life better, but the beauty of this movie is that the prince doesn't rescue the girl in the end, as it claims, but rather she saves herself. After all, Julia Roberts character chooses to leave her rich boy toy, take his money and go back to school and off the streets, he shows up in the end, well, because it's Julia Roberts and only a fool doesn't go back for her (I'm looking at you Lyle Lovett!) but there is no marriage proposal just a homeless guy talking about dreams and you wonder, will they make it? But does it matter, because our heroine saved herself, she doesn't need a man! And lastly, if someone comes in with money, don't judge them, make your commission and sell them the store. I mean, seriously huge mistake, right?

3. National Lampoons Christmas Vacation. Yes, I know this is totally classic 80s but what lessons could be found here? Well, first of all that all families have crazy and weird people but we love them anyways because we are family. Second, parents do so much for us as kids that we don't appreciate just to make sure we can havehappy great experiences, so clap for you dad's amazing decorations. Everyone has crappy neighbors, so feel free to hate on! Old family members should always be included in family events, if anything because they will always keep it interesting. Video your kids while they are young, time flies and if you are ever left behind, locked in an attic, you will need a way to pass the time, so don't forget to back up to the icloud.  Lastly, no one loves a cheap person or working for a cheap company, so be careful of both.

4. Poltergeist. I know this is another odd choice, but this movie thought me everything I need to know about real estate. First, always ask if anyone has died or is buried in your property. They have to tell you if they know, but have no duty to disclose if you don't ask. Also, when making contact with the other side, make sure you stay away from the creepy old evil guys. And if the t.v. goes all black and white, run as fast as you can. I think these are solid lessons, along with the most important which is make sure you marriage is solid because if a poltergeist becomes obsessed with your family, you will need a strong marriage foundation to help you through the tough times.

I guess what I am telling you is that sometimes, you shouldn't worry so much about what you let your kids watch and don't judge other parents about what choices they make with their kids, because there might be a method to their madness. Or maybe they just really wanted to watch that movie and well, you can always tell your kids to close their eyes. Also, the 80s was the best decade for movies and you should hit Netflix for a weekend of life lessons and family fun, all ages included.

2 babies under 2 yrs old ...a cautionary tale!

"New mothers enter the world of parenting feeling much like Alice in Wonderland."

So when my son was 8 months old I found out I was pregnant again. I cried for two days. We were not ready, we didn't have more money, we still had an infant, and I had 10 pounds to loose still from my son's pregnancy.

My hubby took it like a champ, he didn't cry, at least not that I saw. The second pregnancy was different. I had been more tired, my "glow" was not present, like with my son, where everyone kept complementing me. My skin was that of a teenager, my belly and behind got bigger much sooner, and my energy was nonexistent. Not to mention that when people ask, how far along I am, I often have to rely on my phone app because I really have no idea.

So that led to the following questions, do I look like a whale? Does my son realize that I have become less fun than dad, who can pick him up and chase after him for more than 20 min at a time? Am I not loving this baby enough, I don't even know how many weeks I am? And the most important question, how will I ever love this new baby as much?

I eve asked my mother (mother of five) to just be honest and tell me that she loves me the most. After all, as the oldest, I am going to realize the truth as soon as the baby came. But she swore she loves us all equally! I wasn't so sure but figured we would see soon enough...But I kept thinking maybe it would be like the grinch, whose heart just grew jut when he didn't think it could.

Everyone I encountered had one of two reactions: congrats, that is the way to go (either because they too did it this way or waited to long between kids) OR omg, your hands will be full (aka, are u crazy?) Then, all the positive people tell you it will be super hard in beginning but once in school it is a breeze. It is a very crazy thing, to know you will be insane for the next 5-6 years.

At 7 1/2 months pregnant with my daughter, I found myself excited to meet her and a little sad that my first has transitioned to toddlerhood so quickly. I could appreciate how quick it will all fly,
how  little sleep I would get, and how much I might grow to love.


Now here, on the eve of Mother's Day, my daughter is one and my son two and I love them equally. I'm still working on my weight, and I still get the you did it the right way or you must have some guts, comments.  But this is all I know, and I wouldn't have it any other way. In the end, no path to motherhood is easy, I'm convinced that we worry as much as we do while we are pregnant, to get us ready for all the worrying we will have for the rest of our lives. My mom was right, it never stops.

I am still a little stressed now an again, but I just keep telling myself, if Charles and his wife can do it so can I!! (he is a guy I went to law school with, who had triplets a little before I did, and found out his wife was preggers again when the trips were 6mos or so. They have 4under 2. Hey, it helps to know someone has it worse than you! Sorry, Charles)

So, to all my friends who claimed to be jelous of the 15 month gap between my kids, here is the true story, it is scary and exciting, and if it happens to you, I will both congratulate and warn you, it might just be the best journey of your life.

Happy Mother's Day

Xoxo

Not just another pin!! Furniture Revamp!

First comes thought; then organization of that thought, into ideas and plans; then transformation of those plans into reality. The beginning, as you will observe, is in your imagination. -Napoleon Hill



For me first came my obsession with change. Just like I cannot keep my hair the same for too long before I get bored, neither can I keep my house the same. I am one of those restless souls, filled with too much imagination. Then came my passion for Pinterest. I pinned all these amazing things and finally got inspired, thus turning my pins into realities.
 
About a month ago on a walk with the family, we stumbled across an estate sale. We found and bought a beautiful china cabinet made in the 60s or 70s. The quality is beautiful and it was so well made, back then they built things to last. The only problem was the color. Brown. We are not natural wood brown kind of people. Here we had this amazing piece of furniture that would never go with anything we would own. I began my search to paint it. But quickly realized that I did not want to start with such a large project.


after

After

 So, when two weeks ago a friend offered me his Hunstville dresser and nightstand for free, I said, " challenged accepted". Lucky for me my kids needed it.






I decided on a key lime green. The two pieces were in great shape and were built to last, you just can't get furniture built like this without spending close to a grand. I took off all handles and then drawers and got to priming..


graveyard of drawers

STEP #1: 

I used about 2 cans of primers for both. Klilz spray paint primer is the best!!!  

 

Then I sanded down with a 320 grit in between coats of the primer, it took two. cans



sanding block with sanding paper: use this before priming if any uneveness and after all layers of paint.

I bought a tact cloth to wipe down the dust from the sanding and general dust and dirt that accumulated during the entire process. helpful hint: clean out the dresser well before starting, you would be surprised how dusty it can get.
 
STEP #2: spray paint with color of choice. I used this:

spray in back and forth motion about a foot away from furniture

It took about 2 cans for both pieces. The thing with spray paint is that you have to have patience to let it dry in between coats which is great when you have little ones, because you can spray and leave to dry and take care of their needs.
 
 Remember that your first coat will show part of the primer underneath. In between coats make sure you lightly sand down any rough edges or areas where bubbles appear or drips occurred. There is no mistake that can not be fixed with some gentle sanding. So don't be scared of the sanding aspect or the spray aspect if you never have done it before. Keep spraying until fully covered.

this nightstand had sracthes and nasty stuff on top we clean and sanded, but left it uneven. so we used wood spacle and filled it, even it out and sanded it after it dried. This will give you a smooth even surface to paint. So don't be scared of furniture that is in not ideal condition.

I didn't want to invest in new hardware, so I just sprayed the rusty one I had with the white primer and left it at that. When the drawers are dry and the dresser/nightstand was dry I placed it all back together.  Then comes then last step.
 
STEP# 4: spray your furniture with polyethurane or lacquer. One can was enough fomr both. The oily and lacquer come in spray form. The poly helps protect the painted furniture and the lacquer gives a beautiful shine. The trick with this step is that you must sand very lightly in between each layer. Use at least a 1,000 grit paper if you can find it. I used a 2,000 one. It takes about 3 coats of lawyer on any piece of furniture to get a nice shine.

  This was a super cheap and fun project that totally changed the looks of a frumpy piece of old furniture. I got so inspired by my success that I even painted my IKEA night stand from white to the new hot color of the season, Tangerine Tango.

 

I took my boring tables and turned them into the pop of color that I needed.






 
Painted my headboard wall grey and with my Black and white furniture it makes for great statement pieces.

  Don't be afraid to take on a DYI project, do a little research take on a small project first and be inspired. Don't let those Pinterst pins stay pins only anymore...happy pinning! Let me know what you think. And be on the look out for the china cabinet post, I am going to paint it coral, with gold hardware and a pale grey back and a fun twist that i am keeping a secret!!

2 nights of cooking = 3 nights of meals!!

“...no one is born a great cook, one learns by doing.”
― Julia Child, My Life in France

So as brand new mother of two under 2, I find it hard to have the energy to cook something new everyday, but as usual I am using my maternity leave time to come up with new recipes and ideas to help during a busy work week and still put good food on the table for my family.

Here is a recipe for 3 totally different meals but only two real nights worth of cooking, all meals take less than half an hour to make and are easy breeze, plus will give you left overs for lunch.  I hope this inspires and helps moms and even the single ladies to get in the kitchen! 

Day 1: Slow cooker chicken fajitas

Go shopping, here is a list of all that you will need for the next three nights:
1. one large white onion
2. one red, yellow, and green bell pepper
3. ground beef (about 1 pound )
4. boneless chicken (about 1 pound)
5. flour tortillas
6. rice
7. chili powder (1 tsp)
8. cayenne pepper (1 tsp)
9. pepperidge farm puff pastry (1 packet)
10. chicken stock (or 1 chicken bouillon)
11. garlic (at least two cloves)
12. egg (1, optional)
13. beef bouillon (1)
14. sofrito (can be purchased in Latin section of market, brand Goya (red jar)

Cut half the onion (long strips), and the red and green pepper (take out the seeds) into long strips. Place in the slow cooker with the garlic.  Take chicken and cut into long strips (fajita style) and place in slow cooker.  Take half a cup of the chicken stock or half a cup of water with the dissolved chicken bouillon in ti and add  the chili powder and the cayenne pepper, give it a swirl and pour over the chicken.  cook the chicken for 3 hours on high or set in the morning before work on slow and let it cook while you are at work.    heat up so tortillas and serve!!

(note: this fed 2 adults and a child and should render at least half for left over for day 2 recipe)

Day 2: Chicken and Beef Empanadas

Take out your left over chicken and let it come to room temperature.  Take out the puff pastry and let it thaw out until it is a little soft. 

Take a pan and cook the rest of the onion (diced fine) and the yellow pepper (diced fine) and garlic with 3 tbsp of sofrito, for about 2 minutes, then add the ground beef and the beef bouillon.  cook until in browns and set aside to cool.

Preheat the oven to 400 degrees.
Spread some flour on counter top and cut out circles for the empanadas, take remainder dough and make into a ball and roll  out into a flat dough again until you use all of it. Take each circle and spread a little like you would pizza dough around the edges.  Take a spoon and fill the centers of the empanada circles, half with left over chicken and half with the beef. Don't over fill it bc they will over flow when cooking.  Place each filling in the center and fold over and seal with fingers by pinching the edges.  To really seal before cooking, take a fork and make the edges.

Place empanadas on baking pan spaced out and brush egg wash over each for a nice golden color.  Bake for about 15-20 minutes, or until puffed and gold brown. 

note: this will rendered 10-15 small empanadas, enough for 2 adults and 1 child and left overs for lunch.

Save the left over beef for day 3.

Day 3: White rice and Picadillo

Cook the white rice in rice cooker.  When rice is done, reheat the beef (picadillo) and throw on top of the white rice and serve!!

note: this will also render left overs! delish with sweet plantains, too.

If I can make these recipes with with a 16 month old and a 1 month old, you can too!  Try them and let me know if they worked out for you.  Don't be intimidated by Day 2, you will see how easy it actually is and you can always fill these with any filling once you know how to make them!


Buen Provecho!

My Homebirth Experience

"the knowledge of how to give birth without outside interventions lies deep within each woman. Successful childbirth depends on the acceptance of the process."

Suzanne Arms

"birth is not only about making babies. birth is about making mothers...strong, competent, capable mothers who trust themselves and know their inner strength."

Barbara Katz Rothman

So when I decided to embark on this journey towards a home birth, I knew that I had to do my research and prepare both mentally and physically for the labor.  I read every book I could find at the public library on home births and women who had home births. I read every blog and story I could find on line.  I saw countless of videos and documentaries.  By the time my contractions started I felt ready.

I will admit that, unlike my first pregnancy, I was ready to have this baby by the last two weeks of my last trimester.  Everyone, had guessed that I would go early, but as my due date came closer I realized this little girl was not in a hurry. I wanted the baby to come soon, since my mom would be arriving the night of my due date and I wanted her to be here for the birth and to help out those first few tough days right after.  So I let myself go to 40 weeks and begun my quest for a natural jump start.

Monday , April 23rd (40 weeks)

All weekend I had been having random contractions.  One or two of them about once a day.  I thought something for sure was going to happen.  But I had also been super stressed and upset because the Friday before, my dog had escaped our fenced yard and become lost.  I had been in touch with my midwife and my doula all weekend but nothing. So on Monday my midwife suggested that I might want to try an acupuncturist, they sometimes had sucess in naturally inducing labor.  I had never done acupuncture, but was willing to try anything.

After work, I went to see Juana, the acupuncturist.  She did her thing and I must say that I left there much more relaxed than I had when I had arrived, which is what acupuncture is supposed to do, relax you in order to help labor get started.

I got home and found my midwife Colleen Nelson (Scarlett) and my lost dog.  After a quick cry, she checked me and asked if it was ok to do an internal exam, which she had avoided doing up to now.  I was curious to see if I had dilated and said yes.  She checked me and said I was a little over 2 cm.  She then asked if I wanted my membranes stripped, this helps further dilation (if you are already more than 2cm and your body is ready).  I said please!

She stripped my membranes (which is another way of saying, irritating my water bag) and while uncomfortable it was not painful.  By the time she was done I was now 4cm dilated.  She said baby was low and could feel the head, so I felt good about labor starting soon. That night I had a few contractions but nothing.

Tuesday, April 24th (my due date)

I worked from home that day,went on a long walk, and cleaned up and waited for my mom to get here.  That night I stayed up late talking to my mom and catching up.  I had some bloody show this day and kept loosing my mucus plug throughout.

Wednesday, April 25th (birth day)

That morning I worked from home and then my mom and I went for one of several walks of that day.  My neighbors are used to seeing my big preggo self walking around everyday, trying to walk the baby out, I always got sympathetic looks, so it was nice to have my mom tag along.  We walked all the way to CVS where I bought castor oil. (4oz bottle).  I continued to have bloody show throughout the day.

My midwife had suggested that I do a castor oil mix, if I really wanted to try to naturally induce this birth.  Clearly, I was desperate because I did.  At 10:30 am I drank 4 oz of castor oil, 4 oz of pineapple juice and a shot (2 oz) of vodka/saki (all mixed).  It was gross and it left a nasty after oil taste on my lips.  It was supposed to start working in 4 hrs.  My mom and I went for another walk.  

At 2:30 nothing was happening, and I felt like I drank this nasty thing for no reason.  I did some further work from home and then went for another walk with mom.  My midwife checked in with me and asked me to stay hydrated and eat lunch. I did both.

At 5pm I started to feel the effects of the castor oil mix, which is supposed to help you go to the bathroom, and the stomach pains simulate contractions and should begin them if you are ready.  This was the worst part of my labor. Every time I went to the bathroom I could smell the castor oil, which made me want to barf. 

By 6 pm I thought I was having contractions in between the bowel movements.  Each bowel movement burned and the contractions while tolerable were not fun b/c of the bathroom trips.  I texted my midwife and doula and told them I was starting to have contractions.

By 6:30, my doula asked me to start timing them and keep track.  I tried to do this myself, but by this time my bowel movements had stopped and I was having contractions pretty often and occasionally intense.  In fact, once in a while I was having a really intense one that lasted over a minute and a short intense one would piggy back to it. 

At first I labored on the toilet, which felt good for what ever reason.  Then, I couldn't take it, and moved to my birthing ball, where i rocked from side to side during the contractions.  I breathed thru each one and this was very helpful.

By 7pm I asked my mom and husband to time me, b/c I could tell that they were much closer together and the intensity was strong.  By 7:30 pm we realized they were 4 minutes apart, lasting about 1 minute for the past hour.  We called the nanny to come pick up my son and take him to sleep at her house (we didn't want to worry about him and not be able to focus on the matter at hand, plus needed to rest since we knew it was going to be a long night).  As I got ready for active labor, my husband called the midwife and doula.  I put on my ipad to play a consistent loop of "long time sun" ( a song that helped me relaxed and listened to during my prenatal yoga) and asked my husband to fill up the pool.  My mom who had been dreading being present during the birth, mostly out of fear of not being able to handle seeing me in pain, was fantastic.  She helped fill up the pool, she massaged my back during contractions and was super supportive.

By 8:30 pm the whole team was at my house.  My midwife checked my blood pressure, listened to the baby and moved to put an IV to administer antibiotics. My vessels kept collapsing, so it took several painful pricks to finally get it in.  As soon as the IV was in, I got in the pool.

                                         totally focusing on breathing and riding the waves!
It was around 9pm when my IV came out.  My midwife checked my pressure and the baby's heartbeat.  Everything was going well.  The contractions were intense but I just kept breathing them out.  The ability to rest in between them, made a world of a difference.  This was a significant change from my first birth.

My first birth was at a hospital where I got induced.  It started with cervadil, followed by pitocin, and breaking of my waters.  These contractions were intense and with no breaks in between, they felt unnatural and unmanageable at the time. NOW, I know why!  They were not normal.  These contractions were strong, intense and about to be painful, but they were manageable.  The rest periods were like pieces of heaven.  My Doula, Kelly Aguirrechu, kept throwing warm water down my belly or my back, depending of my position and it felt so amazing.

                                         my mother was suprisingly calm and a great help.
Eventually, the contractions became beyond intense.  My body was tensing during the contractions severely and I felt tons of pressure at my bottom.  In fact, I told the midwife that I felt like I might have a bowel movement.  She told me that was just the baby coming down. 

Now this is where I kind of lost my mind for a minute.  I thought, I can't do this!  I was wrong, this is too much for anyone to bear.  They all lied to me.  I looked for my mom, who was crying quietly in the corner. I told her it I was OK!.   That's when I realized that I was ok.  I wasn't crying, and I was in fact doing this.  So I told my midwife that I felt like it was time to push.  I don't know how to describe the natural urge to push but to say, that your body just knows. 

With every contraction I pushed.  My husband held my right hand and my doula the left one. I braced each leg on the edge of the pool and breathed out the contractions.  It helped to tell my self to open, open, open during each contractions.  Sometimes out loud, sometimes to myself.  All the lights being off except the bedside lamps helped me focus on what I was doing.  My doula and husband kept putting ice cold towels on my head, neck and back, which felt amazing.

Now the last 15-20 minutes of this birth were the most painful and intense part.  Right before the baby's head came out, my water broke.  This pressure was like nothing I have ever felt before.  I must have seemed like I lost my mind, because my eyes rolled in the back of my head, I thought i would burst, my back bent and I felt as I my body was possessed and floated up into the air, I couldn't breath.  Granted this entire thing lasted 3 seconds but it was tough to handle.  That is also when I heard Kelly's voice yell my name and tell me to breath, and so her words slowly registered and I took the hardest breath of my life. 

My daughter's head came out at 10:40 p.m. The ring of fire, as they call the period in which your child strecthes you as her head makes it's way out, is just that!  Is it the most painful thing in the world? No, but it is super uncomfortable, and the pressure you feel is both distracting and intense.  At this point I yelled to the midwife, "take her out".  I had seen enough t.v. shows and videos to know this could be done, but she informed me that she couldn't.  I couldn't push, I had to let my daughter turn.  (as it turns out, she came out with her hand by her face and to pull her out could have hurt her and me, and caused me to rip). It helped to hear my husband say, "One last push". This put things in perspective.   So I took short breaths and waited until my next contraction where I held my breath and pushed her into the world! No tearing took place.

10:50 p.m.

My daughter floated up into my arms, in a pool of warm water, in the dark , and by the light of the moon.  I heard my mother cry, my husband kissed me and I looked into the most beautiful girl I had ever seen.  I was surprised to see no blood on her and the pool was not flooding in red either.  It was all so clean.  My little girl opened her eyes, looked right at me lifted her head and took her first breath!  She was pink and healthy and had 10 fingers and toes.  We stayed there for a bit while I cycled thru a couple of more contractions. Then still attached to each other via the umbilical cord, I walked with my daughter (and help) to my bed, where I delivered the placenta. 
The midwife explained and showed me the miracle of the placenta which provided all the nutrients to my baby for the past 10 months. It was amazing! While I had the option to do something with it, I opted out, so she got rid of it.  My husband, my mother and I all covered me in towels and laid there while my midwife and doula stepped out.  It was amazing to be in my room, surrounded by my family without anyone interfering and my child in my hands. 

                                                                          hungry girl!
Sometime later, my midwife came in, cut the umbilical cord with my husband and took the baby to do her examination.  On the other side of the bed, she heard her lungs, measured her, did her footprints, gave her vitamin K shot and took her temperature.  All the same stuff they do at the hospital but you don't get to see.  They cleaned up everything, changed the sheets after feeding me and making me go to the bathroom. I was shocked to see how little swelling I had. 

                                                             baby getting weighed!
I laid back in bed and breastfed my baby who was hungry for food.  I looked at my husband and my mom and together we all decided that Luna was going to be her name.  She was 8 pounds and 8 oz., measured 21.5 inches long, and had lots of hair.

Even now my midwife and doula keep saying it was the most beautiful and peaceful birth they have experience.  They say I was quiet and focused and essentially breathed her out of me. I pushed 3 times and welcomed her into my arms.  My mother who thought I was crazy but had been supportive, said she expected lots of screaming and blood, but was surprised to see none of that actually happens during home births.  My mother and husband both found it to be moving and a wonderful experience. 

                                                            my amazing birth team!!!
I felt amazing.  I still feel amazing.  I did something that I wasn't sure I could actually do, after all, reading about something is not the same as doing it.  The whole experience was supportive and peaceful and exactly what I hoped it would be.  While my choice might not be for everyone, it was the right one for us.  I am still amazed that I actually did it.  I feel stronger, confident and connected to God!  I can't explain how amazed I am at my body, and it's ability to do what it was meant to do.  Birth for me has a whole new meaning, I get all the talk about it being natural and this thing not to be feared.  My son's birth was amazing, my daughters birth was amazing.  Both have changed me. Motherhood is transforming no matter how you do it.

I had a home birth that was safe, beautiful and perfect.  I am just like you, with no special ability to handle any more pain than you.  I am educated and made this decision with the consent of my OBGYN and much thought and consideration.  I did this for myself, my child and family.  I did it with an open mind, and not to achieve some delusional birth ideal.  I urge everyone to look at all your birthing options, and whether you chose hospital, center, or home birth, I wish you to do it with knowledge and understanding that birth is a life changing experience and you should know as much about it because it is transformative and a rite of passage that unites all women that have ever existed on this Earth!  Don't miss out on the amazing power of your body.

My son came fast and furious into this world, but my daughter took her time. We named her Luna because she was born at night, because she was the only bright, shinning thing in that dark room when she came into this world and becks like the moon, she came slowly and took her time.

               There is no place like home!!!

A woman's right to birth!!

Things done well and with a care, exempt themselves from fear.
William Shakespeare

There is power that comes to women when they give birth. They don't ask for it, it simply invades them. Accumulates like clouds on the horizon and passes through, carrying the child with it." Sheryl Feldman

Everyone knows that a woman has a right to choose, and for the most part regardless of the side you stand on that issue, it is a right most respect.  But it is amazing to me how little respect there is for a woman's right to birth, where ever and however she wants.

If I have been gone for a while, it has to do with my new job in the middle of my 2nd trimester.  Yes, I am pregnant again.  But that is a story to be told on another day. 

With my first child, I was consider high risk, for a situation that turn out to be nothing really serious. But even with my first child I had wanted to birth naturally (no drugs and vaginally).  I hired a doula, informed my doctor and made myself ready.  But you know what they say of the best laid plans, I ended up getting induced.  While my birth "plan" went out the door once the pitocin kick in, I still had a great birth experience at the hospital. 

But when I got pregnant again, and found out that both this baby and I were healthy and low risk, I started thinking about all those options I had read about during my first pregnancy.  Yes, OPTIONS!! I am NOT a hippie girl, but I do consider myself an open minded person.  So I read, and researched and found out that alternative birth plans outside of the hospital were not as scary or as risky as we have all been led to think. 

I read lots of stories (starting out with the bad gone worse ones firsts, it's my nature, working my way up to the super positive ones).  Now, I will be the first to admit that if you have a health condition or your baby possibly does, then the hospital is the only way to go.  But if you are otherwise "perfect" then, the choices are out there.  I found a midwife, asked her all sorts of questions (background, educational, worst case scenario, etc), found reliable reviews of her, and came to the decision that this might be for me. 

I was actually contemplating a HOME birth.  With a hospital only 8 miles away, and a midwife who knows what she is talking about, and a good bill of health for baby and me, it seemed like a possibility.  So I spoke to my parents, who were not in love with the idea but not opposed, this was particular important to me since my dad is a doctor, i thought he would put up the biggest fight, but was surprised to hear my parents say "it's your decision". 

Then, came announcing this consideration to my friends, this was were I was caught off guard.  While I expected the why's, are you crazy, is it safe, type of questions, I was not prepared for the judgement and harsh criticism from women that had simply, no knowledge outside of assumptions or what they have been told their whole lives.  I was armed with information but they really didn't want to hear it.  All I kept hearing was, why would you risk it? As if I was an idiot, who would make a decision without extensive research, or worse as if I would actually risk my life or that of my yet unborn child. 

Not only, that but was told over and over, that they would never do it and their family and friends would never let them do it.  All I kept hearing is, women judging my very well thought out and researched decision, while offending my family. Had they lost their minds? Most of these people were friends whom have never had children themselves or had never read anything on alternative birthing.  I was shocked!!  I was hurt.

It is tough enough to be a woman and on top of that we are going to criticize each other for decisions we make that are safe and personal, just because we don't agree or understand it.  Shame on all of us!!  There are a millions statistics and stories that anyone could arm themselves with.  But just because something is different and seems scary, doesn't make it so.  And just because something has been done one way for a long time doesn't mean it is the best way to do it. 

I leave you with these thoughts about birth for your consideration.

1. Birthing in Hospitals only became popular in the 1950's +.
2. In England, Netherlands, Australia (non 3rd world countries) many women birth at home with midwives b/c birth is seen as natural and not a disease or risk.  You go to the hospital when there is a complication, like most conditions in life.
3. I know of at least 3 people whose babies died in hospitals, for reasons no one can explain.  Things happens regardless of where you are at.
4. A midwife (a good, licensed one) does everything a doctor would do, carries IV and pitocin with her, knows the same CPR and live saving techniques labor and neonatal nursers do at the hospital, will not allow you to birth at home or elsewhere if you are remotely at risk or your baby is (it is also the law)
5. Most midwives have delivered more babies than most doctors (vaginally that is).

Be informed before you speak like you know what you are talking about.  If I can respect your decisions to birth in hospital or get elective C sections, then you should be able to respect alternative birthing options.

A Waistline Is A Terrible Thing To Waste!!

Blessed are those who hunger and thirst, for they are sticking to their diets.  ~Author Unknown

So I have known for a while that the baby weight was not coming off.  I kept baking and eating and ignoring the obvious tightening of the pants and rubbing of the thighs.  I had done a great job while I was on maternity leave but shortly there after I found it hard to make time for the gym and eat right with work, baby and husband (oh, and two dogs).

After avoiding the mirror and lingerie for months, I finally took a good look and said NO MORE!!!  So back on my weight watchers diet I went, which allows me to eat anything I want in moderation (it's the only way I loose weight and maintain it off) along with some exercise.

But to be honest, it's hard to battle the need for tacos, pasta, and sweets.  So when my sister was in town and pointed my attention to Hungry-Girl.com I became very excited.  The Hungry Girl has a website, books and a new show on Food Network and the best part is that she replaces food that we love with low fat versions that actually taste good.

So far I've tried her Tequila Shrimp (tacos) and her white lasagna to great success! Each of these delicious recipes calls for under 300 calorie a serving portions.

Here are the two recipes I used with my minor changes for servings and other matters (I made them for 4 people--enough for dinner for two and leftovers; because who wants to cook two nights in a row?) Or save it for a yummy lunch option! 

Tequila Shrimp:
2 onions (any onion will do)
1 garlic head, (diced or minced)
cilantro
4 Romana tomatoes
Shrimp (frozen or fresh--also if small use about a 50 count or 6 jumbo per person)
lime juice (fresh or from bottle)
Tequila

Whole Wheat tortilla is optional (2 per person)

Cook: in large skillet cook the onions, garlic, tomatoes  let it simmer in its own juices for about 5 minutes, then add the tequila for about 1 minute (burn off alcohol) and throw in the shrimp, lime juice and cilantro..let it simmer over medium heat for about another 5 minutes or until the shrimp is pink (cooked). 

This was delish and very satisfying!!

White Lasagna
3 medium zucchini, ends removed (because I hate zucchini I used Green squash)
1 cup of fat free ricotta cheese
1/4 cup liquid egg whites (or 2 large egg whites)
1 tsp chopped or minced garlic
1/4 tsp dried oregano
1/4 tsp dried basil
1/4 tsp salt
1/4 tsp black pepper
1 1/2 cup chopped mushrooms (i used baby bellas)
2 cups chopped spinach (frozen is fine, just thaw out)
3/4 cup fat free sour cream
4 wedges of Laughing Cow Light Creamy Swiss (i took me forever to find this, 10 supermarkets later and a second trip I found it at Winn Dixie, Publix doesn't seem to carry it in Florida)
4 tbsp reduce fat Parmesan grated topping (i couldn't find this so I skipped it)
4 sheets oven ready lasagna noodles (Ronzoni makes some; this does not need to be cooked before putting in oven...who knew right?)
1/2 cup shredded part skim mozzarella cheese

Cook: at 425 degrees

• Slice zucchini or squash in half with wise, and then slice each half lenghtwise (1/4 inch thick strips)
• Medium bowl combine ricotta, egg whites, garlic, oregano, basil, salt and pepper. Stir
• In Skillet sprayed with nonstick spray on medium heat on stove add mushrooms.  Stir and let cook until softened (they darkened and shrink a bit) about 4 min.  ADD spinach and cook until wilted and moisture evaporated (3 more min.)  Remove and let cool
• Take the mushroom-spinach mix, blot with towels the excess moisture and place with ricotta mixture, stir.
• Re-spray Skillet at same heat and cook zucchini or squash in batches until softened and slightly brown; about 2 min per side.
• Take microwave safe bowl and combine sour cream, cheese wedges (cut into small pieces), the parm cheese if using, and salt and pepper (1/8 tsp each).  Microwave 40 seconds at a time, stirring every time until smooth and warm.
• Spray baking pan with nonstick spray (8 x 8) and place 1/3 of zucchini or squash at bottom. top that with half of ricotta-veggie mix, and top that with 2 lasagna sheets, follow by 1/3 of white sauce.
• repeat layers (z or s, ricotta-veg, lasagna, sauce) top with last of zucchini or squash, sauce and mozzarella.
• bake for 25-30 min (or cheese is crispy brown)

This was so good and totally carb satisfying.  Only 7 pts under weigh watchers and each serving (4) is 290 calories.

Quick Weeknight Dinner: Perhaps these recipes seem too daunting and you need something you can cook in half an hour, then try this delish cod recipe.  I came up with this on my own and its about 9 points per serving.

2 (4oz) fillet of cod, fresh or if frozen thawed out.
2 tbsp of butter, soft
2-3 sprigs of rosemary
1 lemon
1/2 a can of large crushed tomatoes
2 tsp Italian seasoning
1 cup of cooked rice (brown or white)
salt and pepper to taste (1/2 tsp of each)

In small bowl combine the butter, rosermary (off the stem) and juice from half of a lemon, set aside.  In a large sauce pan, heat over low medium heat the tomatoes, 1 tsp of italian seasoning and salt and pepper.  Take the cod and rub the lemon/herb/butter mixture on top of the cod (cover completely).  Take the cod and place it on top of the tomatoes in saucepan, add salt and pepper.  Cook on stove top at medium heat for about 15-20 minutes.  Then transfer to the oven for another 10-15 minutes, until cooked. 

Take out of the oven and place with white rice. Squeeze the rest of the lemon juice over the fish and tomato sauce (and rice if you like).  Enjoy!










Of course you can't forget dessert!!! Because baking is a little more technical I included step by step pictures!!Here is a recipe I found for 2 inch brownies for 137 calories a piece.

need: 9 inch pan sprayed with non stick veggie spray and line bottom with parchment or wax paper

makes: 16, 2 inch squares
BROWNIES1/2 cup dutch process cocoa powder
1 cup all purpose flour
1 tsp baking powder
3 tbsp unsalted butter, melted
1 cup granulated sugar
1/2 cup dark brown sugar
2 large egg whites
1/2 cup unsweetened applesauce (just stole from baby food container)
2 tsp vanilla extract

Here is a tip: you can use egg whites from carton, instead of separating the eggs (i just used the left over after the white lasagna); for the brownies use about 1/3 cup if using carton egg whites!

• set oven at 350 degrees

• sift cocoa, flour, baking powder, and salt into bowl.  (tip : if you don't have sifter use whisk)

• beat butter and sugar together, until well combined.  ADD brown sugar, egg whites, applesauce and vanilla--ONE AT A TIME, beating until smooth and scraping down sides after each addition.

• stir in dry ingredients half a cup at a time, mixing well after each addition.
• bake in pan for about 25-30 min.
• cool on rack for 5 min, then invert out of pan and on rack, peeling off paper, invert again and let it cool.
• cut into 2 inch squares and enjoy!!

Don't say goodbye to your waistline, say see you soon...goodbye implies that you will never see it again!!!